As a bulimic, we are so “engrossed” in trying to make everything work in our lives. We are perfectionists with a cause. To ensure that we accomplish everything on our list of expectations.
What we don’t really understand, for those of us who stuggled for years, is that if you add up all the time we spent binging and purging, we wasted time that could have been so much more valuable.
Why? Because for us, this was time to ourselves. But the “ourselves” was not at all that.
I look back sometimes and think “I still lived a full life, so why beat myself up over all those hours lost?” Reality is that it WAS time lost. Not gained.
I am grateful that today I can get up and live a full life everyday. NO I LIE. Not every day. There are still times when my productivity is low, when I just want to lie in bed and not get up. But I have more purpose now knowing that I CAN kick my own butt and when I am UP I am not in the fridge, I am not looking for the next binge. I am up creating yet a new beginning… every day. Without having to live a lie.
Don’t let bulimia steal your time… we never know how much of it we have left, and bulimia doesn’t deserve to own what is… YOU do though!!
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